what i see...

a couple weekends ago the demon, his girlfriend, fernie and i went to a local park and rented a pontoon.  it was so much fun!!  we had to wait a little while for one of the 3 boats to return to the boat house so while we waited we went for some lunch.  we all laughed, enjoyed each other and the pup.

i took various photos while we were out on the lake.  the demon had a great time driving the boat.  his girlfriend and i laughed and got to know each other a little better.  it was a very fun day. i got home, uploaded some of my photos to my facebook page and bragged about the awesome day! 

then it happened.  i saw this photo.  this was a candid photo that his girlfriend took of me. obviously, i had no idea the picture was being taken. then, she had done the same thing.. she got home and was posting her photos.  she commented how she enjoyed spending the day on the lake with "us three". 

however, all i saw was a fat person.  immediately, i sent the demon a text commenting on how fat i looked in that pic!!!! i sent the photo to a couple friends, whining about how fat i was!!!  .. how i couldn't believe it was posted!!!

thank god for those friends.  as the demon and i laughed about everything.. the friends helped me see my reality.

i kicked cancer's ass.  i've been through 25 rounds of radiation, 5 rounds of intense/internal radiation, 6 rounds of chemotherapy, over 8 blood transfusions, horrible radiation burns, lasting radiation damage, weekly blood draws and IV infusions.  i kicked cancer right in the teeth.  i did all i had to do and came out on the other side.  i'm still here.  other's are not as fortunate as i am.. and i'm so thankful for my second chance.

after talking it over with those good friends, what do i see, now?  

i see a kick ass chic.  i see a beautiful lady that is having a wonderful day on the lake.  i see a person that is living her life! i see a person that - not once during that day - thought about her weight.  i see a person that isn't waiting to lose weight before she gets out there and enjoys life. i see a woman that has kicked cancer's face in and is enjoying that exact moment in her life with people she loves.

i see happiness.

my lifelong battle with food and weight will never go away.  no matter the size i've ever been, it's never been 'good enough' for me.  but, for right now - this exact moment in time,  i see a person that is living and happy.

i want to thank his girlfriend for taking this photo.  it's quickly becoming a favorite of mine.

♥

If I knew then what I know now.. 10 things.

.. I would not have wasted so much time "waiting until".

.. I would have tried more of a variety of foods as a child.

.. I would have hugged my momma one last time.

.. I would not delete voicemails left by family.

.. I would have taken more photos with me in front of a camera.

.. I would have never rescheduled any pap smear appointments.

.. I would not have gone so crazy with waxing my eyebrows!

.. I would have cut certain friends out of my life sooner, while holding on to others tighter.

.. I would not have ever used baby oil and then lay out in the sun.

.. I would have let go of grudges years ago.

I don't really have too many regrets in life, however,  I do think if I had the chance to do life over again - things would go a bit differently.
I am who I am because of how things did play out, which isn't all too bad. 
But, I think I'd like a redo.

♥

July?!

You guys!  It's been a little more than 2 months.  Geez.  I wanted to be MORE active on my blog once treatment ended.  I wanted this to continue to be a diary of how I am feeling, daily.  Sometimes, no news really is good news.  Recently, I have been trying to get out of the house and do more.  By "do more" I really mean try to get out with my camera.  Physically, I am still sore a lot of the time - but just getting out of the house for an hour or so is really helpful for my mental.  I'm back to working 7 hours a day.  Whew, it's not easy and I have to get up and move around quite frequently, but it's nice to get back to some normal.

Oh!! The Demon has graduated high school.  Can you even believe it!!?? I know I can't.  It's been a very rough last few years, but he's done it!!  No more school shopping, no more tuition, no more arguing over homework, and no more worrying about failing!!  Seriously, it's such a huge relief.  Our house has been so much more harmonious since the end of May.  I still look at him, the 18 year old young man that he's become - and can't believe I am his mother.

Ok, you can say it...there is no dog cuter than this baby.  None!!  This photo was from Blue's 3rd birthday.  I surprised him with a small ice cream cone from Dairy Queen.  It was an amazing trip.  Just look at that happiness!  Too much.  He's changed my life.

Chemo-brain is a real thing, ya'll.  I can't remember if I've mentioned getting a new pup?  Little Lucy! We normally refer to her as lil 'Lu.  She's such a great addition to our household.  She gets along with both Blue & Fernie.  She doesn't back down to either of 'em and is usually chasing them around chewing on their ankles.  She, literally, is an ankle biter!

Finally, I made it to the Ohio State Reformatory!  It's been a dream of mine for a few years to go for a visit/tour.  We - my brother, sister in law, and myself - took off for the day.  It really was an interesting trip and something different for us all to do.  Highly recommend going and taking a look around!

In a couple weeks,  the three of us will be taking off for a few days in Michigan. I can't wait to update and posts photos here.  It's a place none of us have been, so it will be loads of fun and new adventures.  Also, in a few weeks I start physical therapy for my hips.  X-rays have shown no arthritis (which is shocking..) and no bone loss (which is great!).. so my doctor is hopeful PT will help with my pain.

Life, right now, involves a lot of work, more sleep, and a few hours of fun thrown in throughout the week.  All in all, not too bad.

Until next time, take care! ♥

10 moments of happiness.

it's been so long since i've posted anything on this little corner of the interwebs of mine.  i have had a few ups and downs since the last post but i'm, currently, trying to think of positives!  i'd like to be able to look back and think - not everything is so awful.

01.  christmas music
02.  christmas lights.
03.  christmas specials.
04.  any time spent with my family.
05.  when my pups are all taking a nap.
06.  when i get to join them in the above mentioned nap.
07.  my succulent babies thriving in my house despite no sunlight.
08.  hearing the demon, even at the age of 18, cracking up when i am in the mood to be a fool.
09.  a new adding machine at work that makes the most amazing clicking noise with each number pressed.
10.  and.. of course... cuddling with my baby blue.

thanks for sticking around.

You guys..

.. I can't believe it's been so long!! Gosh.  My bad.  We're officially into summer break!  

Now, you all know, I hate the heat.  But, the break from school and the school schedule is worth a bit of warmth.  At least that is what I have to tell myself to get through days when it's gross outside.

This is going to be a totally random, recap, type of post.  A bunch of stuff has been going on with us!

Uh, as most things with me, succulents have become an obsession.  I have gone a tad crazy this spring.  Normally, I am against any type of flower or plant.  I have a black thumb - the blackest of black thumbs.  I asked some friends, as spring was approaching, what types of plants I could keep outside for the year and would be able to tolerate our cold weather.  Having a mischievous cat puts a damper on too many types of indoor plants.  I was pointed in the direction of succulents.  I know, most of what is shown is going to have to come inside, anyway, once the cold weather comes - but, I am stoked!  I love them so much.  It's weird to say that about plants, but..they are so freaking cute. And, I need more.

Speaking of cute....

.. no blog of mine will ever be complete without a collage of my Baby Blue.  Have you ever looked at someone/something and thought to yourself "Seriously, I couldn't love you any more than I do!"  But, the next time you look at them you think "wow, I love you even more today!!" I'm sure I said that phrase about the Demon at some point.. ha!  But, I feel this every single time I look at this dog.  He is my most favorite.

We had to say good bye to Mr. Mao.  What an awful thing to go through.  I've never had to be the one to make the final call when it comes to letting a pet go.  He had gotten so sick very quickly.  It was a very hard decision, but the right one.  We sure miss him, a lot.  That's all I am going to say about that..

Spike has been so much more lovey dovey!  Annoyingly so. But, we're being as supportive as we can, as I am sure he still misses his brother.  As far as the other dogs, they are chugging right along!  Fernie completed her training classes and seems a bit better behaved when it comes to listening to commands.  She's such a good pup...unpredictable, but good.  Ha!  And what can I say about Old Man Truck???  He's still a gross poo eating beagle. lol Although, I can't look at his face without smiling.

Early in the spring I was really putting in the mileage at the cemetery.  Spring Grove Cemetery has been my happy place for many years.  I'm not there as often as I like during the hotter months, but, I'm sure I'll head up there soon - I really need to get out and get back to my walking!  Not to mention, I also have really slacked off when it comes to getting out and taking photos.

I haven't been out for weeks to take any type of photos.  In my defense, I've had a lot of home repairs/work done recently and I've been busy boxing up things and, now, trying to put my house back together.  It's taking much longer to put it back together than I ever imagined!  Spring flowers sure do brighten things up around town.

top left - my brother and the demon / top right - my nephew
bottom left - after graduating! / bottom right - the demon and myself

The Beast has graduated high school!!!!  What?!?!?!  How is that possible?  He was so happy, it was a very nice evening out with the family.  So very proud of that kid.. ok, young man!  His plans are now to turn 18 and head off to boot camp.

Speaking of growing up and not believing how fast time goes?

Yes!  The Demon is loose on the roads.  Everyone in the greater Cincinnati area should watch out!  This year, the Demon is a senior,  turning 18 in November, participating in his first election, and  hopefully  getting a job.  Again.. what?!?!?  Who is this guy?!  He actually wants a job.  I'm sure it has to do with being responsible for paying for his own gas, but still.  It's something!  While I'm on the subject of the Demon, he's had a bit of a rough go at it lately.  He was recently going through some issues we thought had been related to his Ulcerative Colitis.  Unfortunately, after a series of GI scopes, it's been determined he has Crohn's.  To say that we were shocked would be a monster understatement.  It was crushing.  Thankfully, the shock and anger has worn off and we're (read: he) is moving forward with treatment.  If you're the praying type, he could always use them.

I think that's all for now.  Wow, this post is super long.  I hope everyone still reading this little blog of mine is doing well.  Mentally, I seem to be doing okay.  With the Demon driving, my anxiety has seen new levels of high, but, I am like the dogs - chugging right along.

We're more than halfway through 2016, make the second half even better than the first!

♥

Slow & Steady.

You guys!  I've gone 1 full week without injury.  Yes!!!  Now, I don't want to jinx myself, (like I did with my toe...) but, I'm pretty happy about that fact. ha!  

I've gradually been increasing my daily walking/steps.  Slowly but surely I am improving every day.  I may be sore as hell (back/hip) by bedtime, but, I am in a much better state of mind - and that makes it all worth while.  At least, that's what I tell myself.  I don't think about the fact that I *may* be overdoing it a bit.  Also, I may or may not (read: definitely) have braved my beloved trampoline over the past couple days.  Now, I don't jump.  I'm barely bouncing at this point.  BUT, just getting up on it and moving back and forth makes my little heart happy - so, as long as I'm not in pain as I do it, I'm going to continue (against all the advice from everyone I know, lol!)

Verdict on the toe:  broken.  Shortly after I blogged last week, I noticed more bruising.  My toe had turned a delightful shade of dark red and black & blue. I thought I had better get it checked out.  The last thing that I wanted was to wait and then delay healing.  Thankfully, it wasn't a true break in the bone.  Instead, I broke a piece clean off.  Yowsa!  The healing time is shorter with this type of break, therefore, I'm looking at 2-3 weeks in that lovely boot.  As of today, I am confident I'll be able to get a shoe back on in 2!  One great perk of this whole situation has been grossing people out as I send them random photos of my toe. :)

Finally...

Look at that face!!  Gosh, I don't think it's possible to love any harder than I do for that pup.  Ok, I guess I do love the Demon a little bit more.. (just don't tell baby Blue).

Happy Wednesday!

Thanks.

I was wasting time on Facebook and one of those "memories" popped up and it was an old blog post. It's apparent, in that post, that I was not in a very good mental place and needed to take some time to intentionally find the good that still surrounded me.  

That was 2011.  

Today, I find myself in a similar state of mind.  Now, I look back at that post and can't remember anything significant going on in my life.  Maybe if I looked at a few posts prior or following - something would be triggered... but, going just off that one entry, nothing comes to mind.  Without going into too much detail right now (don't you worry, I'll update soon enough!) I thought I should  take the time to find the good surrounding me, right now. 

Today I am thankful for:

- finally having health insurance.
- having a roof over our heads and food in the fridge.
- my family.
- my friends.
- having a job.
- chocolate.
- my baby Blue.
- yoga pants and leggings.
- & this song...

Whoa.

It's nearly November (HINT: MY BIRTHDAY).  I can't believe I haven't posted a blog since January.  What the what!?  There have been many times I've sat to do a post and just couldn't think of anything to say.  Weird, huh?  It's not because I've spent the last, nearly, 10 months on the couch doing nothing.  Although, there has been many hours spent watching Netflix and Amazon Prime videos/shows. 

During my time away, I've accomplished some major purging of my house.  I've worked on my room, dining room, living room, and basement.  We still have quite a bit of work to do in the basement..

The Demon passed his 10th grade year!!  He's never struggled as much as he did last year with school.  He's back into the swing of things and chugging right along.

I've purchased a new Jeep and the Demon now has his temporary driving permit! Until a month or so ago, he showed no interest at all in learning to drive.  I knew it was only a matter of time before I was going to get a new vehicle and I thought maybe that would be the motivation he needed to finally make the leap to test for his temps.  (He will be given the old Jeep)  It was!!  He passed on his first try.  I have to say that I am so proud of that guy!!  It was a huge deal for him.

We've had a great summer!  The family (my brother and sister in law, the boys, and I all went to Myrtle Beach.  I've loads of photos I could post from our entire summer.  But, truth be told, I'm too lazy to do so.  ha! Go to my Instagram and catch up! 

Anywho, I thought I'd do a quick post to say - I'm still alive and well.  Trying to put on my happy face and look forward to the holidays.  We'll see how well I do.

I do promise to check back in soon - I've to update you all on my goal for 2015!  How well have I done with focusing more on life?  Stay tuned..

You guys...

... I've so much catching up to do!  Well, not really.  I've been up to the same ole, same ole.  Walking.  That is, up until last Monday.  I slipped down my basement steps and that has resulted in a grade 2 LCL sprain.  I'm on crutches and in some moderate pain, constantly.  Argh!!  My free time has since been spent on the couch with my knee up on a mountain of pillows while I vege.  If I'm not sleeping, I'm catching up on my DVR shows.  I don't want to complain (but I will..) but this is seriously bumming me OUT.  It reminds me of last year when I was sidelined with a fractured toe.  I suffer through the heat of summer to finally reach my favorite time of year and end up stuck indoors.  

*#&!$%

So.. let's look back on the weeks that I've been away from this blog. 

Each Friday I would spend time at the larger cemetery, here in town.  It was such a peaceful time for me.  It was the one time a week I would, without fail, take some photographs.  Like I've mentioned before, if I'm out on the trails, logging my mileage I rarely stop.  It would take a super special shot for me to take a break in the trail.  But.. it happens occasionally.

In a few of the above photos,.. can you see it?!  Snow!!!  We were hit with a very early snowfall.  Love!!  But, for now, I'm hoping that any future snow waits until I'm back up and mobile.  I don't think crutches and snow/ice would mix very well together.

I think, what I am missing most, right now, is not being able to spend that time with Blue.

Don't let these photos fool you, he's a maniac on the leash.  ha!  Especially if there are any leaves blowing about.  He's such a fun dog!  Being sidelined is definitely affecting him, as well...he's needs that 3 miles to expel that puppy energy.   Needs that 3 miles.

We went to a pumpkin farm.  A nice time was had by all.  I'm not sure what it is, maybe because the boys have grown up?  Holidays just don't seem to be as fun anymore.  It makes me sad..

I guess that's all for now.   Enjoy your Thanksgiving!

♥

Another month? Srsly?

How annoying is it when a person types/texts abbreviations like srsly?  Is it really annoying? ha...I do it all the time.  Anywho, I hope the above photo of Belli Boo (Bella) will erase any annoyance I may have already caused. 

If adorable pugs aren't your *thing* maybe the above tombstone will make you smile!  Normally, I don't post graveyard images with a busy background.  I like the focus of my photo to stand alone with only minimal nature in the back.  However, I could not pass up posting this one.  It caught my eye as I wandered - what a moving expression is presented.  Just beautiful!

Okay, so.. yeah, it's been another month since I posted here.  Where does the time go? I need to catch everyone up, in this little blog world of mine, how super exciting the past month has been for me!!

Not really, but it's fun to portray that image - right?

All lameness aside, it's not been too bad around here.   One morning, last week, we had loads of fog roll through Cincinnati.  As the Demon and I set out for school I noticed a bunch of amazing spider webs in the neighbors bushes.  Ahhh!!!  Fall is just around the corner.  I have to keep repeating that fact because, currently, the weather is still TOO warm for my liking.  I know that picture isn't the best quality, but I'm super impressed considering it was taken with my phone!

I've been a walking maniac lately.  And by maniac I mean like 5 miles a day.  I am sure to most people 5 miles is no big deal.  To me?  It's huge.  I've spent many months not wanting to do anything.  Not wanting to get out of bed.  Not wanting to get off the couch.  This burst of energy and motivation is a good thing.  I also attribute my sudden motivation on the fact that I am one of the most competitive people you will know.  Most of you know my love for the video dance game - Just Dance.  I am a beast!!!  I must beat everyone I play.  And, not just beat them..it's my mission to  crush  them.  That leads me to walking... My brother and I each bought a Samsung Galaxy Gear Neo 2, smart watch.  It's now my mission in life to walk more steps in a day than he does.  It's super hard for me, considering I am sitting for 7 hours a day at work while he works on his feet.  I have to cram in as much walking as my fat little body can handle in the moments I have after work.  It's taken me a few days, loads of sweat, and a few blisters..but I think I've found my groove.  I'm pretty proud of myself!  It's also very therapeutic for me to throw my ear buds in and just go..

moment of truth - i do laps in my living room if i have to, in order to annihilate his amount.  let's keep that secret here..

As I take the Demon to school we drive passed these towers.  Every.single.morning I say "Oh, that would have been a beautiful photo.  This day...I captured it!

Something is so picturesque about the metal giants sitting against the beautiful sunrise sky.  It's just amazing.

So, that's about it.  My days consist of waking up entirely too early, driving the Demon to school, working, picking him up, and walking.  Thrown in there are moments of family laughter, homework arguments, and a couple nights filled with dancing.  All in all - not such a bad situation.  

I'll end today's recap with a huge thank you to everyone that still reads this little area of the internets.  A huge thank you for any new readers out there.  I've been told that a few of my Instagram friends have been reading - what a huge honor!  I really appreciate you all for your support over the last few years.  It's meant more than you realize.

I hope to check in soon!  I mean, it's my most favorite time of the year!!  I have to bombard you all with my Autumn obsessions.

It's been awhile.

long time no see?  i am disappointed in myself.  i really wanted to put forth more effort toward my blog this year and have not.  i have no excuse.  i haven't had any motivation.  i lost my blogging mojo.  to be honest, i lost more than just that.  i've had a rough time lately.  anywho.. i'm here now, and that's what counts!  right?  i should probably take a look at my 2014 goal list and re-evaluate things.

we went away on vacation and spent 4 days in Gatlinburg, TN.  for the most part we had a great time.  however, i did learn that maybe i'm not cut out for being away from home.  my anxieties kicked into overdrive.  i am not sure if it was due to the fact that it's been years since really being away from home for any length of time or what, but.. i was a bit of a mess at times.  thankfully, i realized my issues and was able to talk myself down.  when we spent time on the strip in Gatlinburg and Pigeon Forge and kept ourselves super busy we had such a fun time.  loads of laughs were had, despite my hang ups.  i realized that i needed to talk to someone and i have.  hopefully, i'm on the upswing.  depression and anxiety simply sucks.

as you can see, i am still snapping away!  i really find such peace while out walking/hiking in the woods and strolling through cemeteries.  luckily, we've had a pretty cool summer and i've not been dreading walking around in high heat.  just last week, i took my second vacation.  we didn't travel anywhere but we spent 6 of 7 days out exploring.  we went to new parks and i enjoyed the time spent with the demon.

i am only sharing a portion of the photos i've taken since last blogging.  feel free to follow me on Instagram. i am still trying to work with black and white images.  it's not as easy for me to capture that perfect shot in black and white.  weird, considering i'm not a fan of color. ha!

i'm sad that summer break is quickly coming to an end.  it's such a mixture of emotions for me.  i can't  wait  for autumn!  if you know me at all, you know that i love everything autumn.  halloween, pumpkins, corn mazes, Horror, changing leaves, cooler weather, hoodies, naked trees.. just everything.  but, i hate that school starts back up.  having the freedom that summer brings is something that i greatly miss once the school schedule goes back into effect.  

i guess that's all for now.  we - as a family - just keep chugging along.  we've had a decent summer filled with grill outs, work, family time, hiking, biking, a couple trips to Kings Island, laughs and tears.  before i leave.. i must share some recent photos of Miss Bella Boo (my brother's pup).  she really is adorably awful. ha!

have a wonderful weekend.  i'll try not to stay away so long the next time.

♥

Sweet Fancy Moses!

...didcha catch that Seinfeld reference?  ahhh, will always love that show.  anywho, if you haven't noticed, i have been MIA from this little blog.  i have no real reason other than to say that i'm "busy" with other things i'm lazy and haven't wanted to take the time to sit down and actually blog.  it's not like i'm out doing much of anything.  however, each weekend i try to get out at least once and take photos.  with the weather warming up, that may not happen as often.  i freakin' hate the summertime heat.

how about a little thursday randomness...

• the demon is finishing up his freshman year of high school.  i still can't wrap my head around the fact that i am the mother of a high schooler!  i'm far too young and cool for that fact to be truth.  let's not even talk about the fact that my nephew will soon be driving!!
• probably, i should revisit my goal list for 2014...  i vaguely remember one of the items being for me to not be so hard on myself.  sooooo, i won't bring up the fact that i am sure i'm falling way behind with the entire list.  instead, i'll just say - i'll get to it soon!
• next month my brother and family will be moving next door.  to say that i'm super stoked would be an extreme understatement.  i can't wait for everyone to be so close!  
• i'm about 3 months overdue for a haircut.
• if you're looking for a great collection of music to workout to..or in my case just put me in the mood to walk a couple miles.. i must recommend The Bloodhoud Gang - Hefty Fine & Mindless Self Indulgence - if.  trust me, that music needs to be on (or in?) your exercise playlist.
• i have come a very long way with body acceptance and embracing the fat, however, i recently purchased a fitbit zip. while i don't obsess (very often) about hitting the 10K step goal, i have  found it CRAZY hard to hit that goal.  and, the device sucks when it comes to picking up my Just Dance moves.  i think i'm going to try holding it in my hand the next session.  haaa, is that cheating?  i mean i am moving a lot when i do that crap...and yesterday it didn't pick up much at all.  
• i recently got 2 new tattoos!  (and i already have the next one in my mind)

• i am loving some of the new music out there... Fitz & The Tantrums, and Kongos.  
• i am so used to autocorrect on my phone that i sit here at the computer and expect it to change the misspelled words for me!  i mean, who really has the time to go back and double click the red underlined word to give me the correct spelling.  geez..

i'm not sure when i'll check back in, but i do hope it's sooner than later!  enjoy your week.  if you're a mom - happy mother's day!

almost a month...

...has gone by since I last posted here.  Not good.  I don't have much of anything new to report.  I do have loads of photos I can share?  

I have a thing for the sun and taking blinding pictures.  Most of the time, I can't even see the picture as I'm taking it.  

I am still going to cemeteries and wandering among the tombstones and mausoleums.

This is another shot from Spring Grove Cemetery.  How beautiful.  It's just amazing place to get lost for a couple of quiet hours...

I am still getting up and out.  Hiking, walking, wandering...

We've had loads of ice and snow this winter.  I'm thankful that, despite being laid up for the first two months of the year, I've been able to enjoy some fun, cold weather.

We have added a new furry member to our family.  I have a new niece!!  Meet Miss Bella (Bell Boo).

Couldn't you just die.  DIE!  She's too much.   Don't let these photos fool you.  The only time this little girl is quiet and subdued is when her eyes are closed and she is sleeping.  For the rest of her day...for 99% of this littles life...she's a maniac!   But, we love her.  She was a Christmas present for my brother from my sister in law.  It's safe to say he was totally surprised.  She's been a great addition.

I guess that's all folks.  You've seen what I've been up to.  I'm trying to just get through each day with a smile on my face.  It's working.

Until next time...♥

Photo dump v.4

Well, my - blog more regularly this year - goal hasn't gotten off on the right foot.  Admittedly, I have not even opened my laptop very much over the last few weeks.  Having said that,  I have consistently tried to take photos.  

Most of these pictures were taken on New Year's Eve.  I am so happy I decided to head out that morning and take a walk.  I've been sidelined since... that is, until yesterday!  After 5 weeks in a boot, I was finally able to put a real shoe on  and  walk around all day in said shoe.  That's progress, kids!

To celebrate being able to walk around in a shoe, I've decided (well, I've been convinced, by a great friend!) to hit downtown, Cincinnati, on Saturday and attempt to change things up and photograph the city.  Taking nature shots seems to come very easily to me.  I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed thinking about hitting the city with my camera!

Enjoy your Wednesday!   ♥