July 19, 2017

If I knew then what I know now.. 10 things.

.. I would not have wasted so much time "waiting until".

.. I would have tried more of a variety of foods as a child.

.. I would have hugged my momma one last time.

.. I would not delete voicemails left by family.

.. I would have taken more photos with me in front of a camera.

.. I would have never rescheduled any pap smear appointments.

.. I would not have gone so crazy with waxing my eyebrows!

.. I would have cut certain friends out of my life sooner, while holding on to others tighter.

.. I would not have ever used baby oil and then lay out in the sun.

.. I would have let go of grudges years ago.

I don't really have too many regrets in life, however,  I do think if I had the chance to do life over again - things would go a bit differently.
I am who I am because of how things did play out, which isn't all too bad. 
But, I think I'd like a redo.

July 12, 2017


You guys!  It's been a little more than 2 months.  Geez.  I wanted to be MORE active on my blog once treatment ended.  I wanted this to continue to be a diary of how I am feeling, daily.  Sometimes, no news really is good news.  Recently, I have been trying to get out of the house and do more.  By "do more" I really mean try to get out with my camera.  Physically, I am still sore a lot of the time - but just getting out of the house for an hour or so is really helpful for my mental.  I'm back to working 7 hours a day.  Whew, it's not easy and I have to get up and move around quite frequently, but it's nice to get back to some normal.

Oh!! The Demon has graduated high school.  Can you even believe it!!?? I know I can't.  It's been a very rough last few years, but he's done it!!  No more school shopping, no more tuition, no more arguing over homework, and no more worrying about failing!!  Seriously, it's such a huge relief.  Our house has been so much more harmonious since the end of May.  I still look at him, the 18 year old young man that he's become - and can't believe I am his mother.

Ok, you can say it...there is no dog cuter than this baby.  None!!  This photo was from Blue's 3rd birthday.  I surprised him with a small ice cream cone from Dairy Queen.  It was an amazing trip.  Just look at that happiness!  Too much.  He's changed my life.

Chemo-brain is a real thing, ya'll.  I can't remember if I've mentioned getting a new pup?  Little Lucy! We normally refer to her as lil 'Lu.  She's such a great addition to our household.  She gets along with both Blue & Fernie.  She doesn't back down to either of 'em and is usually chasing them around chewing on their ankles.  She, literally, is an ankle biter!

Finally, I made it to the Ohio State Reformatory!  It's been a dream of mine for a few years to go for a visit/tour.  We - my brother, sister in law, and myself - took off for the day.  It really was an interesting trip and something different for us all to do.  Highly recommend going and taking a look around!

In a couple weeks,  the three of us will be taking off for a few days in Michigan. I can't wait to update and posts photos here.  It's a place none of us have been, so it will be loads of fun and new adventures.  Also, in a few weeks I start physical therapy for my hips.  X-rays have shown no arthritis (which is shocking..) and no bone loss (which is great!).. so my doctor is hopeful PT will help with my pain.

Life, right now, involves a lot of work, more sleep, and a few hours of fun thrown in throughout the week.  All in all, not too bad.

Until next time, take care! ♥

May 8, 2017

May 2017

Wow!  So, it's been more than a month since I've checked in here.  In the most recent past, I had taken a break from blogging because I was recovering from treatment.  I was just too sore (bum issues) and tired (read: exhausted) to sit and form comprehensive content.  And now?  I do not have that excuse!  

It is true, I am still recovering, but, nowadays, I experience a new type of sore.  My lower back and hips ache.  It's as if the entire radiation zone now feels like I have arthritis. My doctor's do not seem to find the connection between the aches and radiation - but nearly everyone in the support group that I belong to experience similar aches and pains.  Coincidence?!  Who knows.  All I do know is that I hurt.  If I sit or lay for any prolonged period of time, getting up and moving is rough.  Also, walking for any length of time beyond an hour has me aching as well.  Argh!  When it comes to this healing thing I need to practice patience - not a strong characteristic of mine.

As far as work goes, I am finally up to working 4 days a week!  I began with shorter work days, normally from 10am - 2pm.  I gradually increased to 3pm,..and now I'm coming into work at 9am.  However, it never failed that I'd have to call off work at least once a week to recuperate.  Last week, was the first full 4 day work week I accomplished since early February!  I'm slowly getting to where I was...slowly but surely.

Speaking of getting to where I was, I am now also focusing on my steps again.  For those new to the blog, I used to be obsessive with my steps.  It was quite annoying for anyone close to me, because that is all I would focus on throughout my day. I had to hit my goal!!! I want that feeling back.  as of right now, I am working toward 3 miles per day.  For me, that seems like such a weak goal (as I would easily hit 3 miles in one outing), but it is a struggle.  I don't want to expect too much from my body for now, and,  don't want to push and push and experience any setbacks.

I hope you all are doing well.  This month is never easy for me, since losing my mom, but I will get through it, as there is no other option.  Time moves on and we're all just along for the ride.  I wish all the mother's out there a happy mother's day!

Until next time... ♥