April 19, 2012

No one ever said life was fair.

It's day 8.  This time last week (well, it was the morning) I was talking to my brother and letting him know it was time to call for an ambulance for my Momma.  I've mentioned before, she was diagnosed with MS in the early 80's.  Progressive MS.  And just like the name says, she has progressively gotten worse over the years.

On Easter Sunday I could tell that she was getting a pretty gnarly UTI.  Because her system is already compromised due to the MS, any extra illness/infection exacerbates the MS symptoms.  In a matter of days, she was unable to move her only working arm!  Her neck had become so weak she was unable to hold her head up correctly.  In the back of my mind I knew it was time to call for help, and after the advice of some friends I convinced my brother to call and go with her.

Since that day she's gone from bad to worse.  It was like a stack of dominoes, that somebody painstakingly lined up - one by one-  that no one was suppose to tap.. got knocked down and ruined.  She was supposed to be admitted for a few days on IV antibiotics and be released from the hospital.  Instead, new health issues have come up and we're faced with much more than we bargained for or ever expected.

I've wanted to blog every day.  I would open the laptop and just stare at the screen.  What do you write?  Everyone tells you to remain positive.  Stay hopeful.  Think happy thoughts! 

 I'm trying.

There were days that I would sit in her room and I would wonder if she knew if I was there with her.  This isn't our first ride around a serious UTI.  We know what can happen.  We thought we were acting fast and doing the right thing.  Don't get me wrong, we did the right thing... just received the unexpected.

So now we wait.... wait for tests, wait for results, wait for treatments to start to work, wait for phone calls.

Just wait.  

And pray.

On day 8,  we continue to wait, hope and pray.  ... and worry.

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