is it easy to be your friend?

i've always considered myself a very good friend.  not only a good friend, but also a person that was easy to be friends with.  i try to always be around for other people to lean on when they need to vent.  i try to give advice.. the type of advice that i'd want to hear (and probably should take myself).  i try to check in with my friends to see how they're doing.  i've always tried to be very loyal and trustworthy.  as awful as the last few years have been for me, i have tried to maintain (at least) some sort of communication with my friends...either through texting, computer or phone. 

i have a close friend that, for MONTHS, we'd talk and text every day, all day - first thing in the morning and last thing in the evening before leaving work.  on some days we would even talk on the phone while driving to or from work.  he was there for me and i him...through a lot of stress - stress with my family and stress with his.  other than my brother, this friend was probably the closest to me during this time.  

recently i have been going through, what i would consider, a friendship breakup?  i don't know how to explain it. within the last couple months the communication has slowed to a standstill.  i still will shoot that first text of the day, and instead of (almost) immediate replies he may reply hours later a one word response.  at first, i thought i had done something?  instantly i go to the "what did i do" mentality.  when i confront him about the fact that i feel ignored or pushed away, he always reassures me and says that everything is okay with us..that he still wants the friendship.  yet, the lack of communication continues.  last week we barely talked at all.  when i really could have used a distraction from the SUCK that my life was last week - he was not there.  and, when he was, he wasn't truly there.  i feel like i'm grasping to a friendship that is not there anymore... or a friendship that he doesn't feel is worthy of saving?  i'm so confused.

so, i started thinking.. maybe it's not easy to be my friend?  maybe i expect too much from my friends?  maybe i require too much attention?  i don't know anymore.  what i do know for sure is that i'm really tired of crying about a friendship - going out of my way to salvage a friendship - when that friend doesn't seem to care the same as i do...

(don't get me wrong, i love my friends!  the people that were there for me last week amazed me.  i am blessed to have the people in my life that i do.  i mentioned to my mom..you really don't know the meaning of true friends until you have them.. and now i know i do.)