January 22, 2012

I need to make myself important.

I have been slacking (no surprise, right?) with this diet.  I seem to come out of the weekend ready to get right back on track.  Monday through Wednesday I am focused.  As soon as Thursday evening comes I am at my limit.  I am trying to bargain with myself.  "I can eat this if I do more exercise tomorrow."  "I can eat this because I still have Friday to bounce back."  "Okay, I can eat whatever I want on Saturday and turn around and start fresh Sunday!"

That arrangement does not work. 

I weighed in yesterday morning and was down only 0.6lbs.  Okay, so it is a loss.  But, is it really the best I can do?  Of course not.  How did I spend Saturday?  Eating crap.  I almost rewarded myself for such a lazy week.  Not acceptable.  I know what I need to do I just need to do it.  I can't continue to live this way.  I want to be comfortable this summer!  I want to feel confident as I am in my bathing suit as we attack the new water park at Kings Island.  I want to be able to go into a store and pick and choose my clothes off the rack.  

Most of all I want to be happy.  I'm not happy.

I know I can keep telling myself (and everyone else) I want to lose weight.. but my actions say otherwise.  This week I am determined to focus all of my energy into this diet/lifestyle change.  It needs to be a priority in my life.

I need to be a priority in my life.

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